Quarantine Chronicles V: What I Learned
Right before lock-down due to COVID-19 my life was in the process of being Massively Overhauled! My family and I were desperately trying to get help and support for one of my children. I was “going through some things” at work and of course my marriage felt shaky and unsettled and I was just a hot mess.
I realized during that process, that not only did my child need help but so did I, no surprise there. Every time I went to a new professional and explained our situation, at some point they looked at me like – “oh you poor misguided child” and asked if I was getting the help I needed? NO, I was not. But finally, at some point I had to stop trying to fix my child, stop trying to stay on top of my job, stop trying to be everything for all of my three children and husband. I had to stop and get help for MYSELF.
I word vomited all over two counselors before I figured out how to pace myself /space out my problems and conversations during my sessions. I then had to figure out what type of feedback I needed. By the time I got to my fourth counselor, I hit gold. We have been working together to help me realize that self-care is Vital, especially now. I had to really take advantage of my early morning opportunities to pray (first thing), establish a real personal care routine that put me first, journal and exercise. I am still working on regular exercise! All to give me time to love on me, truly express how I feel without judgement and to add some loving care back to my soul.
I know everyone talks about self-care like it’s a magic bullet. It’s not. It’s a skill, habit, or routine that takes time to build and appreciate. Like you gotta build it before you can appreciate it.
I liken it to exercise, which I really didn’t appreciate until after the shower.
After the sweating was over.
After the struggle to get through to routine is over.
After the shower that will refresh me (sometimes to my soul).
After the shower, I am able to appreciate the time and effort spent, and better prepared to tackle the next task.
I hope to continue to offer more information about my journey but first I want to encourage you to start your new daily care routine. Because whatever you are trying to start, fix, or change you may need to build up your strength first.
Your partner in the struggle,
Akilah
Akilah is an amazingly strong woman who works in nonprofit. She has a commitment to ensuring access to resources that some people may not ordinarily have. A budding writer, Akilah has begun to share her gift and her life’s lessons with the world. Look out for more written by her here at Life.Breath.Words.
